Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Randomize
