so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
