Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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