The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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