Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize
