She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
