I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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