# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize