I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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