is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Randomize