for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Holy sore nipples Batman
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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