So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Randomize
