Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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