why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
only you would photoshop your dick
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
