i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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