I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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