do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
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