When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
