I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
