Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
