I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
He's on the porch naked. Help.
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