Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
