Girls should come with a carfax report
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize