he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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