Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
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i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
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Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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