Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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