is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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