yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
