I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
