Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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