haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
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