Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
My vagina just clenched in fear
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