I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize
