Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Randomize
