Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
oh god the rape fog is back!
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
