I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
