Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
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