is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
