How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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