How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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