hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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