So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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