I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
