I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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