you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Randomize
