told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
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She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
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MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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