Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
