tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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