cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
