I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Randomize